Day of Surgery (before)

I know this is late.

Dakota had a friend go with us b/c we found out at the last minute that the girls couldn't leave the main floor of the hospital, she helped Dakota watch them. We pulled in the parking lot, parked and I said good bye to the girls....Dakota took them to my sisters until she went to work....Cheyenne had a hard time with it even after talking to her before we left. I told her she was going to go to Aunt Macana'a (Veronica's) house with Dakota, Memphis and Danielle until she had to leave for work then she would come back to the hospital and I would be done soon after and could see her. That seemed to helped, she did ask about Zoila and when I told her she was at school Cheyenne wanted to go to school. I gave her a kiss, hug and told her I loved her, then went to the other side and did the same to Memphis....for some reason Dakota didn't want the talk, kiss or hug.

Chris and I checked in and waited to be called back. I was getting nervous as we waited and took the computer while Chris went to do something, was going to start a blog but read the comments to the last blog and tried to comment but it wouldn't work. For those of you wondering what I was talking about going up my butt, it wasn't a penis, it was a fleet enema. Anyway as I was trying to send that they called my name and I never got it sent.

I had to go back alone to get undressed and hooked up, it took a while for them to get done....not sure why. They finally let Chris come back and we talked about the surgery, that is when I almost lost it. I couldn't help but think I would never be able to give Dakota a brother he could play with, that is all he asked for from the time he was 4 until he was a teenager. I say almost b/c the hospital Pastor came in as I was starting to loose it so I had to compose myself. Then of course I had to ask myself if this was ok with God and should I ask the Pastor if it was ok and I told my self that if it wasn't ok then a Priest would have walked in.

Didn't have to wait long after that for Dr R to come in and say we were ready to roll. I was wheeled in the OR, put on the table then knocked out. I did get to see the robotic machine they used, boy, that thing is cool.

And Chris, I remember the anesthesiologists name was Wendy and I do remember what she looks like.

Oh the hormones

Not a good thing when after having a hysterectomy and not being on any hormones to have your son get in a bad accident...damn lucky he walked away...have your daughter cut her hair b/c it was in her face...she won't keep anything in it to keep it up...and have a friend die.

I have to drink what?

I am drinking my Magnesium Citrate, it is cherry flavored and very sour. The bottle says you have to drink 8oz of something with it, all I have is water and grape juice...neither one taste good with it. This is really making me sick and I still have half the bottle to go. I do have to say, it is better then having something shoved up my butt.

Don't make me mad

Chris and Dakota love to get me going, they work together a lot and I'm not sure who is worse although I blame Chris for making Dakota this way.

Tonight I told Dakota that he might have to take this Thursday off or go in late...it is ok b/c he works for his grandpa. I have pre-surgery tests in the morning...not sure what or why...and Chris has an appointment with his Neurosurgeon....not sure what time....so I told him I would let him know when Chris got home. I told him he could work Wednesday, he was going to take the morning off so Chris could be in my pre-surgery appointment with me but he is worried I won't be done before he has to be at his appointment. Anyway....I told Dakota he might have to drive us back and forth so we can both be where we need to be and he told me he didn't have a license. I thought he left it somewhere so I asked him where it was, he went on to tell me how it was suspended for speeding. Now I'm not dumb so I'm trying to figure out why they would suspend it the first time he was pulled over so I continue to ask questions and he goes on about it not being the first time and about other things until he could see I was going to burst a vessel. He starts laughing and tells me he has it.

Being the nice mother that I am lets him know that if they have to take everything during this surgery that he may not want to play his games anymore. Dakota, "why?" Me, "Well, if they take both ovaries I may be a bitch like when AF comes." Him, "what do you mean?" Me, "You know aunt flo" he gets that look like he doesn't understand on his face so I go one....like I always do when him and Chris get that look...."you know, once a month when blood comes gushing out of me" Yes, that is all I got out b/c he started to yell that he knew now as he walked away.

So long, farewell.....

The witch has left the building forever!!!! May she grace the presence of some unsuspecting little tween and always visit Dakota's girlfriend/wife until I am ready to be a grandma.

Surgery time change

Yes, I'm writing this more so I don't forget b/c I can't find a pen right now. I now have to be at the hospital at 9 and surgery will be at 11.

Just when I thought the pain was gone forever

It came back....and boy did it come back.

AF left yesterday late afternoon, I thought maybe I could participate in Panty Free Friday and was happy...but...I know my body and didn't chance it. Woke up this morning and to my surprise there was no sign of AF and still no pain....after going that long without pain it usually doesn't come back until I get close to ovulating....but it came back when AF did. I swear she always leaves something behind so she can come back and get it...I have even told her I would send whatever she wanted to her...but...she insists on coming back. Now I am sitting in pain and have nothing to take....my Dr isn't on call and I really don't feel like going to the ER and waiting forever...who knows...my pain may be gone before I am seen.

UPDATE: Did't go in, pain went away....of course AF is still around. UGH!!!!

I'm so bad!!!

Chris was asking about what all they would be taking out, I told him the cervix, uterus and ovary.....he doesn't understand why she won't take both out....I told him I think she will b/c of the cyst but to write it down and ask her. He asked why the cervix and isn't that where the peepee goes, what would happen when we had sex and he kept saying the hole would be gone....I of course gave him a funny look and told him to write it down and ask. He told me he was being serious and wanted to know if when the cervix was gone if he would feel my guts....I told him yes. He then asked if I was going to start growing hair on my face....again I told him yes.

Then I really had to get him, see, after the first time we had sex I told him I had a sex change....you should have seen the look on his face, talk about priceless....wish I had a camera for that one. Yep, you guessed it, I told him I was going to be a man again and we were going to be gay, again, I wish I had a camera with me. Since this conversation I told him I was going to have my dick put back on....he told me I needed to stop.

Yes I know that was mean, but you gotta admit it was funny.

BTW That first night he had picked me up from work and b/c my car was there he had to drive me to work in the morning. Lola came on the radio....yes....I got that look again. Yes, he knew about Dakota and did ask about me being pg but I can't remember what I told him. We joke about it often, especially if Lola comes on the radio.

Da Vinci surgery

This is the surgery I will be having done. They can do many different types of surgery with this machine. I must say, I think it is cool that I will be having surgery with a machine....after all....aren't we supposed to be flying in the air like the Jetsons now?

Chris doesn't care for the fact that it is a machine but I think I finally got him to understand this is the new way to go and if it means I will recover faster and if I have to spend the night in the hospital it will be b/c the surgery is so late. When I was pg with Memphis I had seen the flyer about the Da Vinci surgery in the waiting room and told Chris at that time that is what I was going to do. Dr. Russell is one of the few Dr.'s here that know how to use the machine and she even had a demo at the hospital, unfortunately, Chris had to be at work at that time so I didn't get go.

OUCH!!!!!!!

Damn this pain!!!!

The Darvocet isn't working for long anymore and I can't take Ibuprofen until after my surgery, I'm counting down the minutes until I can take another Darvocet.

My first hot flash.......

....oh wait.....I haven't had the surgery yet.....must mean Chris has the heat up to 90 again.

2 3 good things about having this surgery. 1. There is no chance of 3 females having AF at the same time in this house. 2. I will have already gone through menopause before the girls get crabby. 3. I will never again have AF....which means, no more pain or wasting spending money on plugs and pads.

I am betting Chris likes the last one best, he had told me years ago that he would never buy feminine products but he has been buying them the last few months. He has even called me from his cell to make sure he got the right ones.....guess I must get a little to bitchy and he wanted to make sure he bought the right ones.

Oh the pain!

Once again Mother Nature has decided to remind me why I am having a hysterectomy. I am one of the many lucky women who have been blessed with Endometriosis. I have been in for a few Laparoscopic surgeries to have it removed but it keeps coming back sooner and worse then the last time. I am now 41 with 3 children and even though I would LOVE more I know it is better to stop now so I am opting for a hysterectomy instead of numerous Laps before I hit menopause, so Jan 15 I will be having the Davinci surgery to remove my cervix, uterus, left ovary and the right ovary if it has a lot of Endo on it or still has a cyst on it.

I'm not going to lie, I still have days where I am not sure I want to go through with this and I am nowhere near ready for menopause but I can't take the pain.....no I am not a wimp....it took me a year before having my first Lap and that was b/c I was tired of the pain....now the pain just gets worse every cycle and if I don't pop pills at the start then I can't control it and I HATE taking meds. I know I am going to be a bitch and hope to use this blog to get the bitch out of me instead of Chris(husband) or the kids. Chris and Dakota(son) have already told me they have plans to lock me in a room and throw food in to me if I get bad.....sure hope I get to have my laptop with me....yes they were kidding....I hope anyway.

Me and my big mouth

I just had to tell a dear friend that I would start a blog if she reached 100 blogs before Christmas....she did it.....I think she cheated....I don't think pictures should count.....but I didn't tell her that so here I am starting a blog with no idea on how to start it.